15 March 2009

Catholic Sunday: When I go to heaven, I better be skinny.

*Dani's Note: Since Sunday is the Lord's Day, it's only appropriate that I have a weekly Catholic post to reflect on my faith. Here after, I will have a weekly Catholic Sunday post, but I promise to be funny or reflective and not preachy*

For those who don't know, I am four weeks away from becoming a Catholic. Now as shocking as this is for some people to fathom, for me it's the best choice I have ever made. Now there are some things I wish would change (read: clear acceptance of homosexuals, as they are). But all in all, I am happy as a clam and I accept fully in my heart the teachings of the Catholic Church. And as I am reminded, in the fullness of time, things will be understood, which I presume applies to both sides.

Today however, I was faced with something I'm not all together sure I am prepared to accept. I will gladly accept that our life on earth is but a short time, and that the rest of eternity will be in heaven. And I will gladly accept that I must make the most of my time on earth by living a moral life. And I will accept that after we die, our body will join our soul in the heaven.

However. There is one thing I won't accept. I will not accept that when I go to heaven, I will not be an awesome skinnier version of myself. Call me shallow, but I better be a svelte looking soul, because if I get up there and I have to put on a plus sized robe, then all bets are off. And if heaven is anything like earth, I will probably have to drag my ass to the four stores open in heaven that cater to the plus sized girl. And the choice of white heavenly robe will probably be ugly and have an extra panel that does nothing for me.

Or I could just lose weight while I'm on earth and thus, go in with a truly great body. After all, my body is my temple.

*And you thought Catholics couldn't be shallow. I proved you wrong. I tread in the shallow waters with the best of them*


Anonymous said...

Not to worry, Dani -- "One day we'll all have perfect wings."


At least that's what I tell myself each time I curse my rear view.

Dani said...

Those perfect wings better have no arm fat. That's all I got to say!

The Homefront said...

Dani, darling, have I mentioned that I love you today? Because I do. ;) Loving the blog!

Reese said...

Maybe it's like the movie Shallow Hal, and people only see your inner beauty.